it becomes easy

He remembered to call

Yet

I forgot to answer

Damn

I feel twisted

Tight and tangled like a barbed wire fence

Stable and sound

Not with any intent

To cut and scrape

But I do

Nothing but bags full

Of bandages and gauze so readily available

As if

I planned it all from the beginning

Something like that crazy bitch from Gone Girl

And so very different

So now what

I resume from the part where I paused

My life just because I can and I do

I move in and out of time

Blocking punches and curving emotional attachment

They say...it becomes easy

Running away

Staying is hard but leaving is not an option

It’s like I want to smoke a cigarette but I don’t smoke

I know it’s not healthy but what is

We guard ourselves from imaginary threats

And so blindly fall into pits of snakes

Now I’m rambling

But I’m always poetic

Maybe one day I’ll call back

And he’ll remember why he wanted me

We’ll act as if nothing ever happened between us

And that too will be okay and furthest from the truth