a black woman said this by ahsek novel

i saw the face
of a black woman
she had
one blue eye and one green eye
her skin was
brown and golden
just like mine

she spoke gentley
and directly to me
in a cloudy dream
her words were deep
yet soft and sweet

she spoke
look at what we've become
my child
for you were created 
in my image
royalty
african queens and kings
you were my greatest creation
and yet 
i could not protect
you from the world
you have been used and abused
ripped and torn
from my womb even after birth
cursed and sworn into slavery
physical and mentally
you were not meant to be chained
it is my fault
that i have failed you
i ask so much of you
yet you continue to love me
unconditionally
how can this be

for you are not
blind, deaf or dumb
therefore i am ashamed and humbled
by your strength
and forgiveness
that even i do not posess
you are natural beauty
you are gold and sapphire
the rarest diamonds
and have created even
more than i have deserved
only to be robbed of
what you have earned
always fighting for credit
and your rights
simply as a human
you have committed no crimes
or broken any of my commandments
again
i am ashamed and humbled
by your strength and forgiveness

as she spoke
i heard and listened 
silently
with tearful eyes
and my heart caught
in my throat
sweaty palms and pinched nerves
looking god in the face
i did not dare speak
i had a mother
and i was there when she died
in a hospital
so out of respect
i kept my mouth shut

for this image
appearing before me
was something surreal
such beauty
such grace
such feeling of love
yet sadness and sorrow
clung to my existance
as i clung to the hope
that my mother would get better
and even though she didn't
i know she knows how i feel
but 
who was this lady
that reminded me of my mother
beautiful
educated
kind and loving
nothing like the stereotypical
prototypes that have been spoon feed
into our society introveiniously for decades
through magazines, billboards, movies
tv shows and song lyrics galore
i mean how could one think anythng
other than that a black woman was 
nothing more than a whore
an ignorant fool that would birth more
foolish whores
but
is that true
or common knowlegde

i heard god speak again
i turned my attention
to her
the light was so bright
all i could do is
squint my eyes to 
get a better glimpse

she said
my child
do not fear
because your love
is pure
i made a promise
to protect you
because i am
your lord and savior
you have honored me
and held my name on most high
how
can i not love you
how
can i not reward you 
with the kingdom of glory

i was shocked
and amazed but also relieved
this validation
for all the trails and tribulations
was this a mere dream
or some sort of hullucination
a lucid manifestation
similar to my past temptations

she continued
my child
fear not
for i am real
i reside in the earth
the heart and the spirit
never doubt me
for only i know
the day, the minute and the hour
even when it may seem
as though time is running short
remain still

i had so many questions
but the vision
started to fade
and with a blink
of the eye
she was gone

her foot prints
remain scatterd in my mind
and from time to time
i witness bits and peices
of her around me
always encouraging
always guiding

some say
we are only as good as 
our faith
others say 
we are only as strong as
our past
so tell me
what do you believe
have you ever seen god
and has god ever spoke to you

ain't that crazy

amen